tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
