NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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