you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
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