i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
