so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Are we still banned from the library?
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
