A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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