is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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