You're so nebulous sometimes
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
