there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
