I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
