ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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