I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize