I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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