her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Ketchup is God's man juice
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize