question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Randomize
