just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Randomize
