Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
