were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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