So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize