what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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