ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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