yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Randomize
