Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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