where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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