just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
