He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
