If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize