If i could tip my vagina, i would.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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