nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize