her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
