you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
