The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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