omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Nobody cheats on THIS.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
