I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
