David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
