Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
