I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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