i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
