once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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