she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize