I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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