i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Who died my cat blue again?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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