How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
