You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
