So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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