If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize