Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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