i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
