i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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