I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I need moral support for this bender
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
You were trust falling into bushes
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
